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I Don't Remember by Cindi McGrath

        7th Annual Northland College

WritersRead Selected Non-Fiction Prose   

I Don't Remember recounts the first minutes and hours following a brain injury suffered by the author. 

    A True Story by Cindi McGrath


BOOK RELEASE!!! Healing Ellie Healing Me 

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Performed before a packed theater audience on January 27, 2017, I Don't Remember, is a gripping recount of the author's profound amnesia and the losses and realizations that followed. 

Healing Ellie Healing Me by Cindi McGrath. The true story of Ellie’s and the author’s shared journey of self-discovery and healing. Ellie, abused and tortured before being cast aside as a not-quite-four-month-old puppy; this is her story of transformation. Discovered living in a culvert, starving and covered with wounds and parasites; this is Ellie’s journey from a distrustful and traumatized puppy to a healthy, happy, 120-pound lapdog. That Ellie found the one person - the only person - who could save her; was destiny. Author, animal communicator and intuitive healer; Cindi heard Ellie’s plea, ‘Why was I unlovable to them? Help me. YOU show me how to heal. I don’t know another way. I don’t want to be a bad dog.’ The other dogs and humans who shared Ellie’s journey might have chosen the word fate vs. destiny; Labrador Olive, ‘Why are you listening to Ellie? Stop it! Don’t listen to her! I’ve been here the longest and I am the lead dog!’ Ellie’s anxieties were many: fear of water - lakes, streams, rivers, puddles, rain; fear of the dark; fear of the forest; fear of men; fear of young boys - an actual terror of young boys; fear of enclosed spaces. A twenty-four by twenty-four-foot room was, to Ellie, enclosed space. Ellie bristled and then rushed at virtually anything that surprised her, from an insect to someone entering her home. Along the path of Ellie’s recovery, Cindi asked, ‘What do you need from me, Ellie? Where do I even begin to help you through all of this trapped anger and rage? I want to help you Ellie, but you need to help me understand. What does Ellie want?’ Ellie replied, ‘I need a consistent environment. I need a SAFE and CONSISTENT environment, and I don’t want anyone to argue with me over what I feel I need. When someone argues with me I feel like I am going to die and I just start fighting. And I don’t always know WHAT I am fighting. Then I come to, and I have to see what happened. I'm trying to function within that. I'm trying to function.’ You won’t put this book down once you've met Ellie where her journey toward healing began; in a ditch alongside a lonely road on a cold October evening.   All books ordered from this website will be signed by the author! 

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